Here's the scenario: you got divorced from your long-term spouse and you've been faithfully paying your alimony ever since. Now, your ex-spouse has finally moved on and found someone else. They move in together, and you're thrilled - in large part because you fully expect your alimony payments to stop - whether or not wedding plans are in your ex's future. 

What can you do if your spouse denies cohabitation?

While state laws vary widely (and so do divorce agreements) on the issue of alimony and cohabitation, many people have the rightful expectation that the alimony payments that they make will stop once their ex-spouses are being supported by, or are sharing expenses with, a new romantic partner.

However, unless your ex is willing to be honest about the situation in court, you have the burden of providing proof that there is more to the relationship than pizza-and-movie nights on Fridays.

Here are 4 ways to find evidence of cohabitation:

1.) Hire A Private Investigator.

While this can be an expensive solution, it may be a wise economic investment for your future. If the investigation pays off with the evidence you need, it'll be well worth the initial costs. Private investigators are often able to document cohabitation through photographic and video evidence, which can be quite convincing in court.

Investigators often take photos or videos at key times, like late in the evening on weeknights and then again in the early morning. Proof the other person was keeping his or her car there, or coming in and out of the house, strongly suggests they are living together, especially if this is documented several days in a row.

2.) Monitor Social Media Sites

It can be hard for someone to resist posting pictures of themselves and their partners online. Print out copies of relationship status changes that indicate two people are involved with each other. Copy pages with photos of the couple together on vacation, at the movies, out with the kids, and so on. 

3.) Keep Notes

A lot of information may come your way through various sources, including friends, relatives, and (unfortunately) even your children. Keep track of things like:

• the kids being told not to tell you that your ex-spouse's new boyfriend or girlfriend is living there
• the fact that your ex's new partner is behaving like a step-parent toward your children
• your ex moves into a new address (which you suspect he or she shares with the new partner)
• your ex and his or her new partner seem to be sharing household obligations and chores, like yardwork, repairs, or cooking.
• your ex and his or her new partner begin appearing as a couple to all social events

Your notes may not be considered objective evidence, but they can provide a framework for questioning if you end up back in court over the matter.

4.) Get Your Attorney Involved

Your attorney can file the proper motion for modify the alimony with the court. Your attorney may be able to get help from the court to prove cohabitation by:

• subpoenaing rental agreements or utility records, to show joint liability for debts.
• subpoenaing cell phone records that show that your ex-spouse and his or her new partner spend their days or nights together.
• subpoenaing witness testimony that indicates that your ex-spouse has admitted living with the other person as a couple.

Dealing with an ex-spouse who is being less than honest in order to keep the alimony coming is frustrating, but not impossible. It usually takes a little time, and sometimes a little extra investigative work, but you can be successful at getting alimony reduced or stopped. Talk to your lawyer like the Law Office of Diane F. Russell for more information and ideas.